True Confessions

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Posted by Elaine on November 24, 1997 at 11:16:27:

A slow day... now's as good a time as any. There has been a lot of gratitude expressed lately to Rich and myself for maintaining this site and 'hosting' this board. That has left me feeling guilt ridden, so I must confess a few things.

It has been Mr. Mohican Maniac that has displayed an unswerving loyalty and love for LOTM. From day one, this film has captivated his being with not a moment of resistance. Inspired to track down EVERY scene in the movie and create a photographic guide book for other LOTM fans, his efforts and drive have been admirable. But I was not amused...

I do love this movie, don't get me wrong, but after having seen it for about the 100th time and having been spoon fed LOTM morning, noon, and night... I had reached a saturation point. I swore I'd NEVER watch it again and I swore even more at you know who. I mean... how many times can one be dragged to all these scenes? How many times can one rewind the movie to hear every word uttered just to be sure it was heard with absolute certainty? How often can one listen to the soundtrack?!!! (Hundreds of times, I've discovered.) But there was, I thought, a point where it had all gone too far. Like when it becomes impossible to have a conversation unless it's cryptical... a la Mohican dialogue. Or every family outing has to be a Mohican site. I was beginning to (gasp!) hate this movie! So I plotted....

Taking my cue from Magua, there were several occasions when I had entertained the idea of pushing Rich off the cliffs at Chimney Rock Park. A fitting end, I thought. And I rearranged loose rocks a couple of times on some treacherous trails. I wanted to assassinate Mad Maddie, wipe out Schweig and Means, and curse the Mann. (I had NOTHING at all to do with the Academy Award snub, I swear!) I never threatened any harm to Daniel Day-Lewis however, so give me a break. I was SOOOOO sick of Mohicans this, Mohicans that! I thought Rich was mad (I still do, but for other reasons). Then we decided to create the web site as a vehicle to sell the book. It was, according to Master Mohican, going to put it to rest. HA!!!! Then he wanted to add the WWW board??? I thought he was really crazy (sick actually) as I knew there couldn't possibly be but a handful of people who suffered from this crippling addiction. Ha!!! Was I ever mistaken! (You're all so addicted that if we wish to throw a tantrum and get our way, all we have to do is threaten to cut the board!)

I have found that there are thousands (roughly) of people who are infected with this disease. I don't think there is a cure, nor are there 12 steps to recovery. The only thing left to do is get a daily fix at and demand that Michael Mann release a Director's Cut; after all, this is all his doing and quite frankly, it's the least he can do to make amends for the widespread suffering and untold heartache he has caused.

For myself; I have ceased my war against LOTM, surrendered, and have come to realize (or maybe... admit?) that I really do LOVE this movie. Anyway, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em! I may even watch LOTM again tonight. After all.... I haven't seen it since... last week!

What a twisted, long winded way to say... it's Rich you all ought to thank for this Mohican forum and a home for you all to discuss your sickness with other victims of Mohicanitis. Also, I would like to say we have enjoyed and appreciated the humor and wit that has been displayed here by all of you!

Okay? I'm forgiven? I'll not overstay my welcome here and so I promise to minimize my posts. :)
Carry on...


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