Re: Club Meeting

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Posted by Elaine on May 07, 1998 at 20:28:07:

In Reply to: Club Meeting posted by Victoria on May 07, 1998 at 15:24:09:

: Dear Elaine,

: I would say the first meeting of the club (4F's or SWC, whatever) was a qualified success. Mrs. O'Reilly is demanding a small damage fee to repair and reinforce the tables, and replace the mugs that were broken. I think this is a good idea as she is willing for us to return at a future date. Then there is the young Highlander who inadvertantly wandered in with his company's rum voucher, which he was to deliver thereafter. He is willing to settle "out of court" when I pointed out that he probably does not want to show a court of inquiry the offended (and bruised, poor thing) portion of his anatomy, or have it discussed all over camp. I am sure you will report the meeting in the most tasteful and proper terms. I hope we can at some point get down to business. A Miss Munro has contacted me regarding a showing of her "cabin wear" including her popular doeskin teddies. I suggest we pencil her in for the meeting after Mrs. Phelps' presentation. As her husband takes a bath every Thursday night, we will meet then, so she can show us the boots and sword.

: Sincerely,
: Victoria

Dear Victoria,

Though I was forced by to forego the Frontier Females Freedom Fighters first meeting by my oppressive husband, I have been sufficiently briefed on the events. I am pained over having missed such a controversial event and would very much have liked to see that Highlander's expression when he was so wisely adviced to keep his mouth shut. Poor thing. At any rate, I am pleased that Mrs. O'Reilly was willing to accept restitution for damages and look forward to being her guest at Bumppo's Tavern on Thursday evening.

Yes, we could pencil in Mrs. Munro for the doeskin teddies and sword'n boots presentation. We are to be treated to a fascinating presentation on "How To Control Obstreperous Husbands By Use Of Herbs" by the recently betrothed Ros (known around Mohicanland as Magua's Moll). As a Medicine Woman, Ros is very learned in the uses of henbane, monkshood, and prickly pear.
She has also offered to demonstrate tomahawk throwing, heart removal, throat slashing in one easy movement, and how to ambush sucessfully. All these arts have been taught to the Huron Harpie by the master himself, Magua, chief of the Hurons.

I would like to suggest a review of the 12 step program for recovery of subservient behavior. I feel it is a pertinent issue that needs to be addressed.

I will report on the meeting tactfully and plan on highlighting the wonderfully controversial speech I have heard you had given.

Until Thursday's Henbane Takes Effect,


PS I understand Bumppo's has some very fine brandy.

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