Posted by Vita on September 10, 1998 at 06:29:06:
In Reply to: Now Open for Trade in Mohicanland posted by English Trader on September 09, 1998 at 20:46:37:
Dear esteemed English Trader,
Being in desperate need for a copy of Pontiac Moon and Due
South, this Willow is Willing to Wail to the Moon and butter
you up with all kinds of purple-prosed adjectives, even to trap
the TownCryer and disburse him of his gold-braided amulets
and give them to you in payment...
The road to Cameron Cabin has been laden with mine-fields lately
might be Your Highness the Esteemed andGlorious English Trader
whose trader ancestry surely harkens back to the Queen Elizabeth
court wherein the brother of the trader was a choir boy (or was
the choir boy who was the trader as well?? o please do enlighten
us), so getting back to buttering you up, your esteemed, smart as
a fox and clever as a ... uh... whatever suits your refined tastes... drop by with the begged-for goodies at this place called the Empire State Building, at an eatery called Houligan's
... at a conveniet date...
and yea, your hmbl srvnt is ever so glad for a refined English-tea-hour competition to throw dust and chicken-ah-hem--souvenirs into the hithertho unchallenged criminal activities of both the DTrader and FrenchTrader!
perhaps you might even ... thru your excellent contacts and
unsurpassed cunning... be able to hijack he-who-is-silent as
well? If so, I know you will put him up on the auction block, but please let me know first, see, there is this little matter of a
movie, with which i expect to make a fortune and then get even
with the Toothless Cackler Doctor Mary, and The Sassy Soothsayer
Sassily Saying Sooths, who is cutting into my own thriving side
line biz of Tarot Readings...
Welcome Welcome English Trader, smart Member of the Jewel of
the Crown!
Your obedient Servant
She-Who-has-her-heart-set-upon-he-who-is-silent