Southern Hospitality & Welcoming Duties

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Posted by Miss Marcia on September 15, 1998 at 09:56:19:

Dear Courier Readers,

Miss Marcia's genteel, refined Southern sensabilities were shaken to the core when she read the article in Sunday's edition of the Courier saying she was resigning from her duties as Official Welcoming Committee Chairperson. Miss Marcia does not know who started this scurrilous rumor, but she wants to make it known that this is simply just that...a rumor! Why, Miss Marcia is known far and wide for her generous hospitality and her wish to make every visitor feel welcome and cherished, both here in Mohicanland, and beyond. Therefor, her welcoming luncheons will go on as usual, consisting of heaps of Southern Fried chicken (proprietoress reserves right to substitute carrier pigeon when chicken is unavailable), piles of maize on the cob, moutains of smashed 'taters, and slabs of PE-can pie, all washed down with great lashings of mint juleps, and followed by the traditional passing around of the heavy-laden platter of Miss Marcia's own special Downhome Fuuu-uuudge! Welcome one and all! No hungry wayfarer will be refused!

Yours Most Graciously, Y'all!
Miss Marcia

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