Posted by The Bee Holder on October 01, 1998 at 11:49:22:
In Reply to: Re: Figure Eight to Hawkeye...The TRUTH! posted by Sassy Soothsayer on October 01, 1998 at 10:39:51:
Dear Sassy Soothsayer,
This is a remarkable story you have beeheld in your crystal ball. If you will bee kind enough to allow me to comment on one or two points in this psychic Flight of the Babble Bee, we may hive a truer picture yet. First of all, you wrote:
:The upshot of it all is, when he came to, he hadn't a clue who, what, or where he was, and has been wandering the forest ever since as a sort of 18th Century Euell Gibbons, eating oak leaves and licking pine cones!!"
Let me congratulate you on being old enough to remember Euell Gibbons. Even-steven for that low shot about the Kingston Trio a while back. As to Hawkeye's condition, I would point out that, according to his revered biographer, J.F. Cooper, Hawkeye hadn't a clue who, what, or where he was, and has been wandering the forest ever since as a sort of 18th Century Euell Gibbons, eating oak leaves and licking pine cones since he was about ten years old, so colliding with a few rocks was not likely to have flattened the reading on his ECG very much.
After laying out your dramatic story, you requested:
:So, when you are through with your rescue mission to save She-Who-Tracks, could you please send Bee Still My Heart to help poor Hawkeye??
The swarm has beeheld much history of fiddling with Hawkeye's libido by the notorious fiddler of fame, Dr. Mary, who apparently introduced him to pleasures far exceeding anything he could find in a good Raid against the Maquas or even a campaign against the French by the side of his beeloved Fire-Eater. Now his frontier reputation is at stake. Even the Delawares are calling him "woman".
Meanwhile, Chingachgook has languished in captivity for months, and Hawkeye hasn't even missed him. We need a hero here, not a clothes horse. Bee Still My Heart says he will be happy to bore his way through the earwax of the redoutable Hawkeye to deliver your message of love and encouragement when Hawkeye proves he is worthy of beeing called a Brother of Chingachgook.
The Squirrel Fritters sound wonderful! Do you serve them dipped in honey sauce?
Brother of the Sagamore
The Bee Holder
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