I DID Have It!!

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Posted by Kate on September 16, 2000 at 08:46:14:

In Reply to: Re: You Got It, 'She...'! And I ALMOST had it!! posted by Miss Marcia on September 15, 2000 at 23:09:50:

Afternoon Miss Marcia,

Good to hear from you again. Oh, I don't believe it!! Not you too!! What is this sleepy little community coming to?! Things have come to a pretty sorry pass, have they not, Miss Marcia, when a body cannot shop without being abused and set upon by harridans dressed up to represent 'ladies'!! Why MY assailant was at least 7 feet tall - a big, powerful, wrestler of a woman!! And the things she bellowed at me as I struggled to retain my grasp on that jar - oooh, my face STILL burns at the very thought!!! We shall have to find out who that dame is, Miss!! A'pushin' and a'shovin' the good ladies of Mohicanland!! I swear I shall be staying clear of Mervin's Meretricious Mercantile until his 'customer base' improves a deal!! (Besides, I understand he's clean out of provisions.)

Oh no, Miss - not a snit... ladies do not 'get in a snit', my dear! But oh, this hay shortage, price gougin' and tax raisin' just makes a body hoppin' mad, DAMMiiitttt!!! Well, as to fabric not moving up the Hudson, you're quite right, m'dear. Howsever, I DO have some rather fetching bolts secreted in my back passage, which I have been keeping back for just such an eventuality, like the canny Scot I am! Therefore, we may become 'lean and gaunt' as 'She...' puts it, but by golly, Miss, we'll be 'slender in velvet' this winter!! Not like that Amazon who tried to steal MY goods!! I swear she was 'dressed by committee' as they say in my wee corner of the world, hehehe! I shouldn't laugh, really - she's a SAD soul! (hehehe)

And talking of sewing, Miss, I have just this minute finished a pretty little quilt for 'She...'- all bright reds, oranges and golds - oh, with a 'fringe' to be sure!! AND with 'long rifle' covering to match! (No! Standards must not be alowed to slip, simply because we are out in the backwoods, dear!) I DO worry about 'She...' during the Fall Hunt! Up the mountains and out in the howling wilderness, in all weathers! And you hear such stories about careless hunters who mistake humans (particularly those in red baseball caps) for Elk!! They WILL insist on wearing drab, nondescript garb, such as beige/khaki long shirts and leggings, not to mention those dammmmnnn skimpy breechclouts - no WONDER they are seen as 'fair game'!!

Sorry Miss! I was quite 'lost in thought' there for a moment!! Tea? Oh yes, I would LOVE to join you for a cuppa tea!! Hmmm, I don't want to seem a 'wet blanket' here, but I am not sure about your reasonin' concerning 'those bloody Yangeese taxing tea'. It seems to ME that they tax everything else - why stop at our national beverage?! That wonderful golden liquid that gets the Clonies goin' in the mornin's?! (What's that, dear? That's COFFEE?! Oh, coffee, tea, what's the difference!!) But - you HAVE been out in the sticks a little longer than I - you probably have the rights of it. They wouldn't dare!! They haven't seen that Major Heyward first thing in the morning BEFORE his first cup of tea!! If they had, they would know - DON'T EVEN DARE tax the tea!!!

Now you didn't hear it from ME, BUT - I heard that that ole guy and his two boys caused a RIGHT OLE brouhaha up at the Trading Post, t'other day!! Apparently, they were out hunting and bagged themselves an old Elk and brought it down to trade for some knick knacks... I believe that the younger boy was after an earring that could be worn in either ear, the elder boy wanted a bedroll that didn't keep disappearing and the old guy was after a war club that didn't keep bending when he used it. Anyway, I digress... Aparently, that ole polecat, the trader 'He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named' refused to hand these things over, preferring to pay them with wampum and brandy!! Oh boy, did the feathers, not to mention scalps, fly!! And - to really rub salt in their wounds, when they went out to unload the Elk, that ole nag of theirs had disappeared again!!

I tell you, Miss, I do not understand what is happening here!! Howsever, between hay restrictions, duties and taxes, and being accosted in the shops, I can tell you - all this trouble is stirring my blood more than any imagining could possibly have done!!

Anyway, I can 'do' that cuppa around 4ish - that good for you?

Your fri'nd - beg pardon, FRIEND in adversity,
Miss Katie

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