Re: Trade Wars REALLY Heat Up

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: : : : : : : : Mes amis,
: : : : : : : :   In my defence I would like to say the DT did not KO me in Bummpo`s. I was only dazed for a couple of hours but never KO`ed. If the truth be known, DT and I roomed together at G2K and in that time became very good friends. I would look upon this as a "love tap" and not a "left hook". 
: : : : : : : :  On the final night of G2K, rumors had been spread of a bear in camp. So DT and I went to the Cabin Creek to stay with MMMMarcia. Miss Kate, HM and the Woohoo River Trader. While there, thw WHRT, DT and HM came up with this idea for a "sleeping bag for 3". Why 3? You`ll have to ask them. All I know is I was stuck on the "love seat that saw no love". But I can`t see what on earth would cause the DT to be so angry with HM. Unless it had something to do with the sleeping atire HM wore that night. Now granted, being in a house full of female trader, I, FT slept completely clothed out of respect. But that HM had on these lovely blue & check shorts, beige sweater, walking socks and green woolen blanket - a colourful and highly sexy combination (if I say so myself!) Maybe this all had something to do with her recent anger towards the HM. I think DT really wanted that blanket!!
: : : : : : : :  I will continue my work to settle this flare up between the traders as best I can. But if push comes to shove, I have full use of Doc M`s Huron boys to help me put this small revolt down and further bring peace to Mohicanland.

: : : : : : : : French Trader
: : : : : : : : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

: : : : : : : Mon ami! Mon ami! OY!!! You wake from your slumber & -

: : : : : : : You LIE!!! I was there when DT offered you a left jab without so much as a by your leave - I saw it while I was lifting a few tricks that had spilled from her sleeves. THAT was no "love tap" FT. No, no ...

: : : : : : : I know nothing about your loveless loveseat, and even less about HM's lack of color coordinated sleepwear, but I tell you this -
: : : : : : : this "revolt," as you call it, is no revolt at all. Indeed, it is merely revolting. The behind the scenes alliances between you & HM, the WHRT & HM, the 'Sleeper for Three' HM thought up ... come to think of it, HM seems to have her hand in every little dirty illicit happening in Mohicanland! FT, you had best watch your back. HM is British & does not favor les francaise.

: : : : : : : Now - if you insist on calling the Huron Boys into this disagreement, so be it. Be forewarned .... they LOVE non-Swiss Chaw-co-lots & WE have plenty of that!

: : : : : : : One more thing ... DT did want HM's green blanket. What of it? A poor excuse for your betrayal, that is.

: : : : : : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

: : : : : : Meanwhile......back at Bumppos.......the Huggy Merchant, not finding Red OR Mrs O'Reilly, found herself in the unenviable position of trying to find two unspoiled steaks to place on her matching pair of black eyes.  The Dutch Trader in an altogether wimpish move, had skedaddled after slamming the door in poor Huggy's face and the Canadian Trader was too busy trying to gather up the last few remaining Chaw-co-lots to pay any attention.  E Lane could be heard chortling in the distance as she hurried off in search of the yeller-belly Dutchie.

: : : : : : The French Trader, crawling out from under a table, felt the tiniest sense of responsibility.  Well......it could have been that........or it might have been the lingering memory of sweet Huggy's checked jammies.........anyhoo, Monsieur le Francais, seeing Mademoiselle Huggy somewhat the worse for being blind, went in search of some ice over at Miss Marcia's......

: : : : : : "Hello, is anybody there dammit?  Frenchie, get me that ice QUICK!", Huggy yelped, as she crawled over to the rocker by the fire and collapsed in a heap........

: : : : : 
: : : : : Bless your heart, Huggy!  What have you gone and gotten yourself into this time.  Seems I'm always finding you settin' in a rocker weepin'.  Alright, out with it.  And don't give me any of this "just leave me be" stuff.  I saw FT slinkin' away from Miss Marcia's with some ice mumbling something about peach brandy on the rocks.  Looks like you coulda used some of that for those shiners.  You sit tight and I'll scrounge up a bit of something to calm you down.  

: : : : : This is what I get for trailing off after She.  Couldn't catch up.  Drat!  I was hoping she'd let me tag along on her hunt.  Sure woulda been nice...

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: : : : "WoooHoooo, about time you turned up!  Now, where's my hanky? *sniff*  *ssspppppllllluuuuuffff* - always feel better after a blow, dontcha?!  Right, I have had enough of those double-crossing traders, as President of the WoooHooo River Trading Company you are on the Traders Union, and as my partner, I expect some help kicking some serious butt.  I think that I might go track down that little gnome friend of ours, he could rustle up a little (and I mean LITTLE) support - and cause a bit of trouble with their cisterns.  I tell ya, its lucky that I am the merchant of wit, warmth and well-being, otherwise, those devious, snakes of traders would be in some big doo-doo.

: : : : So matey, are you with me......?"

: : : Huggy, I'd be inclined to do most anything for you having seen you in that checked shorts outfit - didn't see me there in the corner did you?  However, back to the subject, I could probably be persuaded to visit a cistern or two and kinda plug them up like.  NOT saying what I would plug them up with mind you, but let's just say I would be killing two birds with one dump er, I mean dip.  Thing is, I'd be more inclined to visit that French toad eater's cistern in spite of his kindness to you.  I mean, frogs are my friends - they warn me of danger and keep the tree stump free of flies and such - and that man EATS THEM! *disgusted and shocked look in his face*  But, were somebody to give me a basket of nice, plump, fresh, succulent mushrooms I might be persuaded to visit several of the other Trader's cisterns.  

: : : GnomeDome

: : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

: : Consider it a deal Gnomie!  Right!  Who wants to go mushroom picking?!

: : (Porcini, cepe or button Gnomie?)

: : HM

: Surprise me Huggy.  Just don't let Doc Mary pick them.  She'd probably choose nice, succulent, tender Angel of Death for the poor, lovable gnome.  Howsomever...if you find any truffles (the fungus not the chocolate kind) I'd be your slave for life.  Of course, you need a pig to find those and root them out.  Hmmm, maybe you SHOULD ask Doc Mary to help out.

: GnomeDome


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