Open Letter to Officer of the Crown

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Posted by English Trader on October 18, 1998 at 18:39:20:

In Reply to: Re: Wicked English Trader? Never say so!! posted by Form Letter from The Royal Governor's Office on October 16, 1998 at 14:06:52:

: The English Trader wrote:

: : Please continue to trust me, newcomer as I am to the rules, as expressed by the Mohican Regulartory Department of Trade Regulations.

: Dear English Trader:

: We commend you on your awareness of the rules of the Mohican Regulartory Department. We wish to encourage all Regulartories to expand their trading activities on behalf of the Crown, and we stand ready to assist you in any activities which will redound to the credit of King George by pumping up the tax coffers.

: Have you ordered your newly designed Ecologically Correct Biodegradable Regular Tory flag yet? If not, you may obtain it by forwarding a request to the Albany offices of Rentokil Group, Environmental Specialists.

: Cordially yours,

: D. Heywoody
: Officer of The Crown
: The Mohican Regulartory Department of Trade Regulations.

To the Esteemed D. Heywoody,
Officer of the Crown:

Sir. I wish to thank you for your kind efforts to assist me in developing trade Mohicanland. I recognize His Majesty's needs to increase tax revenue, given his current situation in the on-going war with our enemies, the French, and their Heathen Indian allays. I pledge myself to assisting His Majesty through the selling of Wish-Ton-Wish and other worth Cooperism as presecribed by the CCCC.

I regret to inform you, however, that I am a good Whig (being of a liberal and broad-minded nature) and therefore hope the representatives of His Majesty's Rentokil Group will not hold it against me for failing to purchase any Tory emblems.

Meanwhile, can I interest you in any additional Cooperisms?

Yours most faithfully,
English Trader

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