Posted by Bill R on August 30, 1999 at 10:02:09:
In Reply to: Group Hug! Group Hug! posted by Doctor Mary on August 30, 1999 at 08:46:02:
Dear Doc Mary of the slimy white hair:
Sounds to me like that goose was using a Norden bombsight and state of the art "smart-poop" technology. Or perhaps it was laser-guided poop and Ms Paddletail was lasing your head with her designator....trying to keep it steady on target amidst her guffaws.
I once had a blackbird do the same to me. Yup. Heard it calling up in a tree as I walked under it, and looked up only to be hit between the eyes with its tidings. Now, that was bad enough, but when you realize that Rooks is the english name for blackbird, well it becomes just downright treasonous.
Now, the old stumpy-legged wood gnome gunsmith was working hard on making a LOOONNNNGG fowler musket for you. It was to be a three man musket, with a feather light trigger. Two men would have been needed to elevate the muzzle, but a woman of dainty touch could easily fire it. It would have shot five pounds of birdshot at one discharge (hence the heavy muzzle and need for two men (without loincloth rashes hopefully) to elevate the muzzle.
But now I come to be informed that Ms Paddletail was in on this Goose-bombing. I can hardly supply a weapon which could bring down Ms Paddletail, now can I?
So, I guess dear, you shall have to wear rainhats from now on.
Or, perhaps you could wrap your head up in a turban of Sticky Linen of which I have tons of the stuff - didn't sell as I had expected *sighs*
You have my condolences though, as one who was similarly bombed years ago.
: Well, Doctor Mary got a real Sign from the Universal Life Force
: today as she was climbing on her broom to go to work (late as
: usual!) -- a large flock of geese flew over her head, and one...er...
: jettisoned a very large poo-poo squarely on her head. *Note
: to Mr. Bill (after he stops laughing)* -- please send a courier
: with a very very large weapon of some sort to Doctor M's domicile
: IMMEDIATELY!! On further reflection, perhaps some Mel Gibson
: fans (there must be two or three) got together and hired this
: thing to cause mayhem and distress to Doctor Mary's normally
: impeccable coiffure...a sort of Hit Goose, if you will.
: Since this Board has gotten very touchie-feelie over the weekend
: during Doctor Mary's absence, she is positive that many heartfelt
: messages of concern and support will just overwhelm her. She's
: got many freshly-ironed dainty hankerchiefs all ready!
: Kiss! Kiss! Hug! Hug!
: Doctor M
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