Posted by Bill R on October 01, 1999 at 10:14:57:
In Reply to: Re: Scientific Anomaly Discovered!!!!!!!! posted by Victoria on October 01, 1999 at 07:00:49:
: Recently, several scientists on their way to a convention (you could tell they were scientists by the calculator holsters on their belts and the pocket protectors in their shirts, plus the tape on their glasses was somewhat of a give-away) became disoriented and lost during a recent horrific hurricane. When the winds died and the sky cleared they found themselves in a trackless forest lost and bewildered so to speak. They began to head westward and eventually came upon a dirt road. They followed this dirt road and came upon a settlement - and as Einstein predicted time is indeed relative as they found themselves backward in time by 250 years. This settlement was straight out of 1750 with houses, shops, tradespeople and warriors abounding alongside frontiersmen and frontierswomen. As they walked down the main street of this settlement, they came upon the shop of a certain doctor. They were intrigued by the long, long line of male patients leading from the front door around the house, up the street and seeming to begin at the doorway of a tavern named Bumpo's.
: : : They were even more intrigued by the line leaving the back door of this particular office of medicine, as each of the patients seemed to be either crawling on hands and knees or walking rather unsteadily and bow-legged.
: : : L to the nth power times M = the quantity (H+W+AOM) squared.
: : : where L = Libido, M = Mary, H=Hawkeye, W=Warriors, and AOM =
: : : All Other Males, the sum of them squared being the number of patents able to be accomodated in a 24 hour period.
: : : Medical science is astounded by this revelation!!!!
: : : Bill R
: : That all goes to show ye what a waste of time all that larnin' is. If those science types had not misspent their youth at the knees of women larnin' the meanin' of little black marks, they would have known from the get-go that all this is just natur; yes it is. Dr. Mary never causes a raised eyebrow here in Mohicanland, sartain. A rousin' night at Dr. Mary's clinic doesn't even rate a notice in The Courier. Can't say the same for her ladies' nights at Fort William Henry. Might do the science types good to obsarve one o' those wingdings!
: : She Who Tracks La Longue Carabine and saw him go into Dr. Mary's clinic, but is still waitin' for him to come out.
: Why Bill,
: The "Courier" has been erratic of late so you must have missed the ladies of Mohicanland distributing handbills announcing the re-opening of Doctor Mary's School of Frontier Modeling and Etiquette. It's just the thing for all those who have been in the woods just a bit too long, poor things, and need to brush up on their social skills.
: Ta ta,
Well, she must be having them model loincloths because everyone in the line was of the male persuasion. I dont even wanna think about what etiquette she might be teaching 'em. I will agree that some in that line did indeed need some polishing of social skills though. Normally ripping the heart out of the person to whom you are talking isn't considered polite conversation. Nor is telling someone that you will put their "children under the knife and so wipe their seed from the earth forever". Some of those in line were quite pushy in fact, fingering their tomahawks and jumping the line in a most ghastly way.
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