Re: Speaking of Accents & Imposter Alert!!!

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Posted by Doc M on November 16, 1999 at 14:39:47:

In Reply to: Re: Speaking of Accents & Imposter Alert!!! posted by Gnome on November 16, 1999 at 13:15:58:

: : : : SUPPOSEDLY "Doctor Mary" writes:
: : : : : I've also heard that this was true about some of the real
: : : : : oldtimers living on the Outer Banks of NC. And there may
: : : : : be a few pockets left in the Appalachians where you can
: : : : : hear traces of it, but it's dying out rapidly. There are
: : : : : two really good books that talk about this, both by
: : : : : Horace Kephart -- "Our Southern Highlanders" and "Smoky
: : : : : Mountain Voices." And how about the music? The more I
: : : : : listen to traditional Irish and Scots music and bluegrass,
: : : : : you hear all the parallels. Fascinating stuff.

: : : : : I know, I know -- an unusual Doc M. post. It happens
: : : : : once in a while. Maybe I got hit in the head! VBG!

: : : : : Doc M

: : : : *ack! squawk!! quackquackquack!!!*

: : : : Help!! Flap-flap! *squawk!* There's some strange person wandering around in Mohicanland claiming to to Doc M! *quack-quack, squack-squack!* This person makes SENSE!! *squawk! squark!!* Call Sheriff Twigg!! Call Martial Art!! Imposter alert! POSTER IMPOSTER! POSTER IMPOSTER! *quackquackquack!*
: : : : No sleazy jokes!! No sexy pink bunny suit!! No bashing of gnomes or drooling over loincloths!! Who does this person think she's fooling?? *squawk!* We aren't as stoopid as we LOOK, ya know!! *ack! Quack!!*

: : : : Send for the FBI, the CIA, the IRS, the UFL, or the SPCA!! Get her outta here!! We want the REAL Doc M! *sqawk!* We DEMAND the real Doc M!! *quack!!* Hand her over, you fraudulent, scum-sucking phony!!

: : : : *Ackackackack!! Squarkle, squerk!*

: : : : Frantically Yours,
: : : : Miss Paddletale

: : : Hey! I kinda LIKE this Doc! Don't be runnin' her off so quickly. Her non-gnome bashing policy is her biggest charm!
: : : Okay sure, she don't look so good in pink bunny suit, and she don't knock the boys down dead at Bumppo's with her black dress, and one could hardly picture THIS intellectual, senseful, sedate Doc Mary dancing on tables.....but let her stay around a whiles.
: : : At least I won't be having to look over my shoulder every time I hear the swish of a broom!!

: : : GnomeDome

: : Ooops! I'm sorry if I frightened anyone! That was Doctorate
: : Doc M speaking -- my "Clark Kent" persona. Since she's
: : extremely interested in this partcular topic, she will
: : be posting more today. She will sign on as Doc-Doc M.
: : And she justs looooves the shy little gnomes of the
: : forest...BROILED!!! HAH! And she looks damned good
: : in that bunny suit, thank you very much...scholarly,
: : yet vulnerable.

: : Doc M

: Oh for crying out loud. Are you SURE your name isn't really Doctor Lechter, Doctor Hannibal Lechter? As in Hannibal the cannibal? At least Magua contented himself with eating only the heart......you seem to want to consume an entire gnome. SHAME ON YOU! FOR SHAME! You can just forget any gournome cuisine.
: I may have stubby little legs, but they can move right quick, and being only 25 cm tall I can go places YOU sure can't go!

: Humph. Seen one Doc M and you've pretty much seen them all.

: Gnome

Oh don't worry so. You're out-of-season now anyway. The true
gnourmet knows they acchieve their peak succulence only during
the summer months. Besides, the Doctorate Mary is a kindly
granola-crunching vegetarian who wears paisley and wire-rims
and recycles her plastics.

Doc M

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