Re: His Cups Runneth Over As Her Brains OOze Out

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Posted by Rich on February 07, 2000 at 17:47:58:

In Reply to: His Cups Runneth Over posted by Doc M-Winchell on February 07, 2000 at 14:02:08:

: I must put down my whips and scalpel and don my fedora with the
: press pass in the hatband to bring you the latest from the
: tawdry underbelly of our beloved Mohicanland...yes, it's
: time for MOHICANLAND CONFIDENTIAL!! *insinuationing 1950's
: style jazz plays in the background*

: It has come to my attention that there is a an outbreak of
: pre-vesion in Mohicanland. First our beloved mentor,
: Richard, displays a photo of himself wearing pearls, a
: dress, and I'm sure sling-back open-toe wedgies as well.
: Halloween my Aunt Fanny! I spoke to the Great and Terrible
: Elaine, and through choking sobs she confided to yours
: truly that her partner in life has changed his name
: to Phyllis, and prances around the house saying things
: like "Don't go there, girl! Unnhuh!!"

: And the infection is spreading!! If it's not bad enough
: the forest is infested with a hideous colony of nasty
: wee gnomes -- now one of them is wearing his consort's
: brassiere and thong bikinis and squeaking, "DO ya think
: I'm sexy, DO ya think I'm sexy!!!" In a word, no.
: The horror! The horror!

: It's not too late, relatively-normal denizens of
: Mohicanland! RISE UP!! RISE UP!! We must stamp
: this out before it's too late! My Hurons have
: massacred the Avon Lady and are sitting around
: fussing about retinol-A face creams and painting
: their toenails! Mr. Poe is walking around in
: a pink chenille bathrobe and hair curlers and
: whispering breathily "I'm ready for my close-up,
: Mr. Mann!" For King!! For Country!! That's why
: we must join this fight!!! Aux Armes, Citoyens!!

: Doctor Mary-Winchell

Doc, seriously, isn't it time for your bi-weekly frontal lobotomy?


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