Posted by Gnome Dome on March 01, 2000 at 20:37:15:
In Reply to: Gnomes! Gnomes! Gnomes! Special Clearance Sale!!! posted by Doc M on March 01, 2000 at 12:31:44:
Oh ha ha. Very funny. Come here you wretched woman....I got a full chamber pot I'd love to introduce you to.
So much for missing me. Ha. Just wanted to re-stock your darn shelves. Well catch me if you can you bow-legged (and we know what THAT came from don't we?), knock-kneed twiddle twaddle!
Poot! Yeah you, you poot!
: The Mohican Clinic For The Terminally Weird is offering a
: special clearance sale of fall and winter Gnome-al items.
: JERKY GNOME!! oops! I mean GNOME JERKY!! Made from
: the most select cuts, seasoned and smoked in Doc M's
: special smokehouse -- which also doubles as the Clinic
: Sweat Lodge, so there's that unmistakable *Hint O' Huron*
: in each piece! Great for snacking on the trail!
: DOC M'S GNOME BUTTER UNDEREYE MOISTURIZER!!
: Ladies, we all know how bending over a hot cauldron
: all day long wreaks havoc on our delicate complexions.
: A nightly ritual of applying Doc M's GBUEM will smooth
: away all those unsightly crow's feet and undereye sags
: and bags! Also good for greasing pancake griddles and
: making red-eye gravy!
: A UNIQUE SELECTION OF TINY CONICAL RED HATS!!
: Great for newborns, changelings, and unfortunate pin-
: headed individuals. (I don't know of any of the latter
: residing in Mohicanland now, but they do drop in to
: visit from time to time.)
: DRIED AND STUFFED GARDEN GNOMES!!
: Arranged in all sorts of comical poses! Fun fun fun
: for all at Spring Planting Time!
: PRICES NEGOTIABLE!! NO REASONABLE OFFER REFUSED!! SILVER,
: WAMPUM, BRANDY, AND SWEATY LOINCLOTHS ACCEPTED!!
: For those who have been asking, our supply of fresh-
: caught Gnome Products will be back in stock shortly,
: as soon as Doc M's Hurons can get back on the trail
: to Oisconsin. They were waylaid in the quaint village
: of Las Vegas, and seem to have been stripped of their
: rifles, tomahawks, beads, leggings, and loincloths by
: a war party of marauding savages -- at least I THINK
: that's what they said.. they just kept saying "Bad 21!
: Bad 21!" Those little scamps! Sometimes I think they
: keep things from old Doctor Mary.
: Kiss! Kiss!
: Doc M
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