Re: Thanks Kate!

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Posted by Gnome shop steward on March 02, 2000 at 23:37:21:

In Reply to: Re: Thanks Kate! posted by Garden Supervisor on March 02, 2000 at 22:26:17:

: :
: : : : Yeah? Well here's to YOU Mr supervisor! Okay fellas, put your toes inward and WE WALK! Gnomes on Strike! Gnomes on Strike!
: : : : If this twiddle thinks concrete gnomes found in any stupid nursery can do the job of REAL gnomes - well fine. Good luck.
: : : : We have tried to negotiate in good faith, but obviously this person has no idea as to the realities of employing gnomes. Heck, if we don't mature until 200 years, and live to be 450 years or so, what looks like inaction to HER is merely a Gnome Break - wink of the eye to a gnome. Humph. Ten of OUR minutes is one day to her, but guess she missed that in her contract book.

: : : : *singing as they leave* "And here's to YOU, Mr Supervisor.....Jesus loves you more than you can know. God rest you please, Mr Supervisor......the gnomes will work no more for you today....."

: : : : Guido Gnome

: : : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

: : : OK, you Commie Shop... (hey what kind of name is Guido, anyway!)

: : : Let's look at things from MY point of view, as Keeper of the Garden, here.

: : : Firstly, Farm Gnome - I hate to even THINK what he is doin' in that corner!! But from where *I'm* sittin', it don't look good!!

: : : Garden Gnome: Yup, that looks like that 'spiv' troublemaker, alright! Hanging round like he has every right to just stand around admiring the garden! Hey! He gets paid to work! Oh, sorry, didn't mean to scare ya', using that kind o' language.

: : : Then there's that other guy, House Gnome - sneaking off the job, the minute his supervisor's back is turned! And thinks that kind of behaviour isn't noticed! Been there, done that! *I* know all the tricks!

: : : Finally, if ever I had proof that my case for termination of contracts was justified, there's that Wood Gnome! His behaviour is just TYPICAL of workers these days! Sloping off, taking a mushroom here, a blueberry there, from his employers. Stealin' is stealin' pal!!

: : : Hey! I KNEW hiring that crew was a mistake, right from the beginning! Trying to tell me they were nearly 350 years old! Did they think I came up in a banana boat?! And now you're trying to tell me that doing something HIGHLY suspicious in a corner, standing around doing nothing when he's paid to work, another sneaking off the job for a 'smoke O' and another nicking company property is supposed to inspire me to accede to your demands that I keep the 'spiv'? I think NOT!

: : : And if I am forced to hire 'scab' labour, well, what can an honest employer do these days?! It seems your lot is headed out the door, pal!!

: : : 'heigh ho, heigh ho, it's off to the Job Centre you go' tra la!

: : : Garden Supervisor.

: : Well fine then. Hire your scabs. I hear that there Miss MMMMarcia pretty much wiped out everybody over 3 feet tall. Good luck finding anybody able bodied (or brave enough to venture out while all THAT fuss is going on). I hear Gnome Dome is willing to pretty much work for might try him. But if'n you want REAL scab labor I would send out a call for Doc Mary.
: : I hear tell she is cheap....know what I mean? ;) She ain't too picky about who she associates with or what the job involves neither! The rest of us wee folk will go merrily into the woods and subsist as we always have....and may your milk turn sour, your garden be filled with weeds, your home be inhabited by mice, and you lose your way for lacking the trails we mark when you venture into the forest.

: : *clods of dirt blackening the sky around Garden Supervisor as forty UGWM union gnomes go to kicking up a storm*

: : Gnome Shop Steward

: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

: Hey! What's with the clods of dirt being kicked about by foot stompin' little men!! I got a Card! A Card that entitles me to one FREE 'bad' disagreement with a 'little gentleman'!!

: I have a sneaky feeling that I should use this card 'tout suite'!! NOBODY should be reduced to having to ask that Doc Mary for help!! And I'm always just a tad wary about about gnomes that will work for 'just about anybody'!!(Though I DO hear that that gnome dome is quite a nice guy! Grovel, grovel!)

: OK - can we call it a draw? Can I get my labour force back? Just one thing, will you have word with that lazy gi.. gnome that refuses to take his hands out of his pocket, and ask him to get on with some hard graft? He makes the rest of you guys look bad! VERY bad!!

: Thanking you in anticipation,
: Garden Supervisor

Okay you guys! Back to work! And you...yeah you with your hands in your pocket. Breaks over. Get back to work! "hi ho, hi ho, it's back to work we go......." sing the four score wee folk workforce as they happily go back to work....union solidarity prevailing yet again*

Oh, shut up Dwarf! We can sing the dang song too. It doesnt belong to just you 4 foot dweebs suffering from gigantism ya know!

Gnome Shop Steward

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