Posted by English Trader on March 25, 2000 at 20:33:02:
To my dear Friends and Colleagues of MohicanLand:
I have returned from my foray to the Antipodes in search of my brother and the Dutch Trader in New Zealand. I had the most Alarming time of it, I must tell you. Whilst in the midst of sending smoke signals to the Dutch Trader via mental telepathy and brainwave action, I was accosted by the Maoris who claimed not to like other people's brains on their waves, only in their stews. I was held captive for some considerable time upon the Beaches of Coromandel, where the scorching rays burned me to a crisp--however, better than than their BBQs. In due course, however, my captors, oddly laiden with French fusils, blue and white wampum chokers and sashes, scalping knives, red wool hunting bags clearly of a Native American origin, and Sundry other French Trade Goods, took me aboard their canoes across the Tasman Sea, and there unloaded me and their goods, handing all to the Aboriginals of that vast Continent. Well, imagine my astonishment to find more French provisions arriving by the minute. I argued and argued that those French wares would do them no good but they continued to hold me hostage. I exlaimed over and over that there was clearly a mistake, for I -- being of a perspicaceous nature -- saw the hand of that foul and low French Trader in league with the Aboriginals.
Well, the last laugh appears not to be FT's, for a Spell was cast upon them and I made my escape. I have returned unharmed, except for peeling skin from the beeches of New Zealand.
I am so pleased to learn that my dear colleague the Dutch Trader, for whom I worried myself sick lest she be held in the same manner, has returned. Methinks the old Dutch ties there still run strong.
And now, for that French Trader, I can only say -- to MohicanLand Friends, one and all -- I have warned you before that he is unscrupulous and this tale only proves he sinks to new lows at every turn. And to the TT, many thanks for your ongoing care and concern.
I Remain, Your Most Humble and Obedient Servant,
Post a Followup