Re: Thanks Kate!

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Posted by Garden Supervisor on March 02, 2000 at 18:12:04:

In Reply to: Re: Thanks Kate! posted by Guido Gnome on March 02, 2000 at 17:31:16:

: : : : : : : WHAT'D I MISS? WHAT'D i MISS? *looking around and adjusting red hat*

: : : : : : : Did anybody hang that danged Doc Mary yet? I jeez I hope I didnt miss THAT event!!

: : : : : : : And where is that Miss MMMMMarcia? My mouth has been watering for some of that fuuuuudddddggggge for 5 days. Man am I sick of fast food. I want some of that nourishing, delicious, much in demand fudge!

: : : : : : : And have my two favorite trekkers been doin' any trekking? How ya been and where are ya's Sarah M and Dana S? You'ns out there?
: : : : : : : Not lost are you? Didn't trip over a trysting Huron and Doc Mary and injure yourselves, I hope?

: : : : : : : Gnome Dome
: : : : : : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
: : : : : : Woooooohoooooo! Good to see you back, Gnome! I've been away awhile myself. Things have been pretty weird around MohicanLand since you've been gone. All kinds of strange goings on. Maybe you can make some since out of it all. Poor Miss Marcia has been put throught the ringer a couple of times, and Bent doesn't seem to know if he's coming or going.

: : : : : : I sure hope they have clods of dirt in Oisconsin. Sure would like to see you kick a few.

: : : : : : Dana S.

: : : : :
: : : : : ________

: : : : : Welcome back, Dana!

: : : : : Jo

: : : : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

: : : : Hey! Great to see the wanderers return!! Isn't it great having the gnome and Daner back!

: : : : WELCOME HOME, GUYS!! Trekkin' all by yoreselves in the wildnerness ain't all it's cracked up to be, eh?! Glad to have you back in 'the fold'!

: : : : Take care,
: : : : Kate.

: : : Thanks Kate! That earns you one "get away without clods of dirt kicked at you" card valid in perpetuity - getting you one gnomal transgression free when presented to any participating gnome!

: : : Gnome Dome

: : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

: : Hey, neat! I've never had one of them before!! Of course, I doubt if I will need it - insulting 'small' people is not what I do! Au contraire!! I EMPLOY a couple of 'little' people!!

: : I have one who's job description involves holding a fishing rod and guarding my pond, by shooing low-flying cranes from stealing my fish. I have another who's remit includes using that shovel in his hand for gainful employment and the other, well, I haven't actually seen him DO anything! He stands under that mushroom at the bottom of the garden, with his hands in his pockets and seems to have a look of 'why work when you can watch OTHER GNOMES do it'. Well, I can see that we are quickly reaching the parting of the ways - he and I are going to fall out VERY soon! I will have NO slackers on MY team!!

: : Any chance this card can be transferred and used to safeguard my 'rear' from this tiny little 'spiv', when I give him his UB40?

: : I appreciate your thoughtful gift - may HE appreciate it also!!!

: : Kate.

: That last gnome - the one you slanderously call the "tiny little spiv" is a member in good standing of the UGWM (United Gnome Workers of Mohicanland) and as shop steward I advise you to treat him kindly else you could be witnessing a walkout of garden gnomes....just a kindly word to the wise doncha know. And yes,
: we do take gratuities, gifts and bribes, thank you.

: Guido Gnome


Mr. G. Gnome,

I don't know that I care for your tone, sir!

According to the Terms of Contract, Section III, Clause A, I have every right to dismiss those gnomes who, having been given three chances to 'get their fingers out', have disregarded the Contractual Agreement. I assume having given a rather 'rude' sign with the digits of BOTH fingers, according to said Contract, means he disputes my legal right right to terminate his contract! But, MY lawyer says I can sack him!! :0P

Therefore, any and all gnomes who wish to face disciplinary measures, through siding with their 'no leg to stand on' 'Brothers' may also find that their employment may be in jeopardy!! Just a word in your 'shell-like', mate! I would advise caution on the parts of the other workers, when considering taking up the spades and fishing rods of other workers!

The jobs MUST go on! I may be forced to take on NEW employees! There IS a queue at the Job Centre, at this moment - indeed, as I speak!! I HAVE been to the local 'Garden Nursery' and I have seen SCORES of umemployed gnomes, standing about, wondering where their next wage envelope is coming from!! Workers, I CAN get!! Have I made the terms and conditions of employment in my garden, clear?!

Proceeed with caution, Mr. Gnome!
Garden Supervisor,
Head of Garden Services.

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